The crisp air. The smell of the damp soil. The small things that remind me of him… The early morning flights returning to see him, filled with excitement and exhaustion. The trips we took together, all beginning in darkness with smiles of exasperation. The enthusiasm of a little boy bouncing off the walls ready for a day of racing motocross. The warm cuddles beneath the blankets before a long day at work. How do we keep going when just living our days hurt?